I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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