Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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