I think I am morally bankrupt
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
