there was a trapeze. enough said
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
