'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
