Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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