hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
