Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
he just fucked me for my cheese.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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