i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
