How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
that's an acceptable place to lick
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Randomize
