Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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