dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
