BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
