Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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