good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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