Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
