covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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