You made me cry and you don't even care
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
These tits shall not be calmed
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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