dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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