well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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