I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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