You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
