You were right. It hurts to walk today.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize
