Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
