the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
