Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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