She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
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