I'm going to jail i love you
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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