there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize