I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
We are two peas in an std pod
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
It was a blind-side dick pic.
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