tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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