I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
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pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
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