i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize