Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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