So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
time to smoke my breakfast
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Randomize
