I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize
