Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize