He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
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