you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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