Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
