ya dads aren't the best wingmen
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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