is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I need to sanitize my soul.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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