My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
