It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
