butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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