He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
