We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
