I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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