so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza