He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
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The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
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It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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