sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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