I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
How does one acquire holy water?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
