obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
why do cheetos always look like penises
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
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