Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
